Before The Storm: Diary Entry #2

​Today, 22nd September, '17

​I can't believe it, I made it! I'm on the Varsity squad! I had to have Jason pinch me in the car on the way home, it was crazy! The little twerp left a mark, but I'm way too excited to care. I mean, I knew I was going to make the team, but figured that at best I would be on the Varsity Reserve team. Nobody in my grade ever makes it to the full team, and especially not in the events that I do. But I did it!

Coach Reinhold said that I displayed “impeccable grit and determination” and that they “had a spot for me with the big team, after all.” Towards the end of the season last year, I felt like I had a real shot at moving from JV to Reserves, but here I am on the Varsity!

​We start practice on Monday, and I'm not going to be able to sleep all weekend, I don't think. I got invited out to see a movie, but I don't think I'd be able to sit still for two hours. Alyssa jokingly said that I was probably going to live in the gym now, but she's not that far off. Training has been my major focus, and now that it has paid off, I'm not going to slack off. I'm going to work even harder than before and prove to the coaches and the other girls that I deserve to be in that spot.

One thing that was sort of strange, speaking of the other girls, is that a few of the regulars weren't there. I know that they don't really have to try out like everyone else if they were already on Varsity, but they at least usually show up. I wonder if it has anything to do with that weird cold that's been going around?

My whole family has been feeling sick, besides me, and most of my friends too. The News people think it's just some sort of flu, like Bird Flu or something, but even they don't really know. It doesn't seem to be that bad, just makes them feel gross and tired a lot. And really grumpy. I know a bunch of people at school have been getting it and missing days, but I guess I hadn't really thought to ask whether it's what kept Alison, Ashley, and Becca from showing up to the try-out. I wonder who'll take their spot if they don't get better before the season starts? Maybe I just did?

Whatever, I can't think like that. I've gotta stay positive! At least that's what Mom keeps telling me, so I'm going to try and follow her advice for once. I've been so out of it for such a long time that I have got to start letting myself enjoy things again. It's just really hard, you know? Why do people expect you to be happy and move on after someone dies? Why can't I just be sad about it for however long I need to be sad about it? Why can't I just focus on the things that help me...not focus?

There I go again, I have got to stop doing that.

Ahhh! Excitement, Moira! Remember! Good things!

Okay, that's good enough for now. I'm exhausted, but I don't think I'll be getting to sleep any time soon. Thank goodness it's Friday! Maybe I'll go to that movie. I wonder if Lucas will be there? He keeps finding his way into my social circle somehow, in a glaringly obvious attempt at getting closer to me. I don't know how I could be any more obvious about my lack of interest, but you know how boys are.

Anyway, I'm falling asleep while doing this, so I think that's probably a good place to stop. I forgot how much I enjoyed writing in this thing. I've really got to try and do it more often. Thanks for the diary, Grandma April. Even if it has fish on it and looks like its for a ten year old.

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