she drifts across the lonely waters; at peace with the world
lifeline for a life lost; disregarded now
what is an existence if not your own to embrace
the water comforts her; more than any one being could
meaningless praise can not compare to the currents
take her further away now; to a place we can not touch
cold empty hollowness of the sea; a tide that brings an assurance
who is to say it is so wrong; are we not our own makers
water takes her ever far away
to a better place
a peace of mind
Wave goodbye to what we were; a hand falls following
Kingdoms of courage and cost; ashes of loss
Her banner set ablaze; my courage torched with it
No chance to bare an heir; no hope for reprieve
Our world brought down around her crown
Ambition quivers in the wind; the arrow flies further
Tears that flow down crimson cheeks; a dagger plunged into her back
Which shall slow to a stop first?
A palace worth remembering; forgotten shambles of defeat
She believed us to be better; iron forged with the strength of promise
Her silken shawl of halcyon became a beckon of torment
Forever is her beauty lost; sullied by the blood of despair
We stood before her as one; laid to rest together
My sword joins her circlet of mishap; omitted by the victorious
Doomed to be buried; traitors of sensibility
In her place a new crown to bring down
I never was a part of you; a silent destruction of expectations
All the pieces placed down upon your feet; a shadow made of rejection
Nevermore do I follow a false promise; a fate of wandering deceit
You could take it all away; all but that part of me
My not so secret obsession; delusions borne from desires
It took away my purity; a monster I’ve become
Compulsion eats away the senses; the need grows stronger
One thousand ways to make it true; terrible things done to you
They converge in the middle; unabashed lust and loathing
Uncontrollable thoughts a torrent; the world is spinning
Further and further away; from the reality and actuality
Hate and love intertwine my mind like rope; strangling rationality
Please take it all away
This part of me
I get a kick out of browsing the Wish ads on Facebook and felt like sharing some of the weirder ones that I came across today. -C.H.
Listen to the others now; loud in their discontent
Voices shattering conventional silence; hate from a place of ignorance
They shout your name; meaningless and hollow
Misguided and afraid
Speak your words of lust; of the faint elegance between
Let harmony entwine the two of you; a kind reprieve from evil nearby
Perfection of her saccharine impurities; not lost on you at least
Sensible and tranquil
Delicate touch of a hand in your own; a disputed embrace among the multitude
Sensations of unbridled bliss; beside oneself in paradise
Together in a quiet meadow; blood red roses checkered about
Forbidden amity of passion burning bright
See her love before you now grow; defiance of the wicked
They know not of such purity; of nothing as real as this
Two hearts find a way together; a troubled path to a place of honest beauty
Sweet emotion built upon fickle petals of misplaced fear
A lone blade of grass; born upon the circumstance of crown
Royal appurtenance short lived
A deception by blood; set forth a justification of future treason
Mother loves another; cast away by a listless thought of lust
Who now claims an undesirable? What place does discarded luxury have?
They see you as nothing; to bandy the living as if insignificant
From the comfort of nobility to the pits of manmade avarice
But you have something still; polish and a blackened heart
He leads a conquest that will eradicate your people; but you pay no mind
In you a purpose seen; the remnants of a golden past
Chance given though unusual; in return a want naught but of loyalty
A request for your voice made; discovery of love that smolders deep within
You had the chance to flee; but what was there to go back to but treachery?
Home was found with them; built upon the ashes of your erstwhile culture
Allegiance burned through your heart like a field on fire; blind obedience replaced by devotion
You become something entirely different; the betrayed who became the final betrayer
A princess of nothing who would bear a burden of drastic decimation
La Malinche; a malachite conqueror born upon the circumstance of abandonment
Sway along with the cradling waves; they remind me of you
Found safe among the tide; a betrayer so true
Nourishing the senses; drowning in the deception
Abandoned like the wretched deceivers
A frigid embrace overcomes; warmth left only in hand
Your touch a damning reminder; slowly slipping further away
Taking me deeper into the royal shadows; a life left to waver
Entwine my heart in jaded sea tangle
Bleak moments become crushing memories; compression too intense to breath
Fear finds a place inside my heart; water in my lungs
Frightened not by the current; only by treachery
Hazy blue becomes nothing more than black
I reach the lowest place to be; coarse and caustic
We become something we swore not to be; villains of the circumstance
Nine thousands pounds of pressure; nine thousand ways to mislead
Left searching for the one way to say goodbye
“Blow it out your barracks bag, Hank.”
“All I’m saying is, it’s pretty obvious why you and I are out here and not in there.” said Private First Class Henry Davidson to his visibly frustrated Sergeant.
“Somebody’s gotta be out here, so I’m not sure I see your point. Ain’t nothing we’ve done different than any of those poor saps getting shredded downtown before getting here.” SGT Rinaldi chimed in response.
“Look Sarge, I’m not complaining about it. I’m just saying…the Captain must not think either of us are all that vital to the cause considering we’ve been sittin’ on our hands in this dump of a church for days now.”
The two of them were assigned to a recon position on the outskirts of Aachen during the offensive on the city itself. The Nazis were dug in deep and the US Army was advancing slowly, day by day, towards the middle of the town. They found themselves being ambushed often and were experiencing heavy losses along the way. The same could be said for the Germans that were left, though they were doing a good job of hit and run tactics by hiding out in cellars and attics before attacking in the dead of night. Capturing this town would be a huge step before the eventual push into Berlin. The enemies knew this and were fighting as if the war depended on the outcome. And in many ways, it did.
“Like I said, still better than getting shot or blown to pieces by some kraut bastard while you’re taking a shit.”
“That almost sounds like a better time than being stuck here with you another day or two.”
“Yeah well, I’m all you’ve got, kid. So either shut up or go kick bricks.”
They both knew that wasn’t true. They’d grown close over the last few months’ worth of fighting as the 30th Infantry Division and 1st Infantry Division stormed towards the “vaterland” under the banner of the 1st Army. Soldiers had a way of talking down to each other as a form of endearment, and their bond was no different.
“You know what would be really great? Beer.” said Henry, with his head resting on the back end of his machine gun; half looking out of a window and half falling asleep.
“Now why is it that you’re always finding new things to say that make me sad?”
“All I ever heard about before we got here was how great the beer is. And yet, I’m as dry as ever.”
“Kind of hard to find beer when half the city is piles of rubble; I’d venture to say most of the bars are probably good as gone.”
“But there’s gotta be something left right? Especially out here where we are.”
“I wouldn’t count on it. Those krauts were stuck in those pillboxes for weeks before we finally flushed them out. Probably drank every last drop in town.”
“Yeah, you’re probably right. Would be nice though…”
He heard SGT Rinaldi let out a deep sigh from his side of the tower.
“Yeah, yeah it would. What’s say I went out looking for some?”
“Ha. Yeah, I wish.”
“No, I’m serious. It’s not like our boys aren’t pushing further away from us here anyway. I really don’t think there’s going to be any Panzers crashing out of the tree line for us to have to warn them about at this point. And we’d be fucked if they did anyway; may as well see about having a drink or two before that were to happen.”
Henry turned on his side to look at the Sergeant behind him, almost waiting for him to admit to it being a joke.
“What? I swear. We’ve been through about as much shit as you can throw at a guy and now we’re just sitting out here waiting for…for what? A call that we can waltz into the city with the rest of the fellas or get killed in a counterattack. Fuck that.”
“I’m not sure who you are or what you did with the Sarge, but…welcome to the tower!”
“Like you said, there’s gotta be something left around here. Someone’s stash, a forgotten box tucked away in a closet, something for us to get a buzz from. If I just go out for an hour looking, what’s the worst that could happen?”
“And besides, I’ll still be up here if anything does go down. It’s not like this gun needs two of us once it’s placed down. I just won’t be able to shoot shit behind me.”
Sergeant Rinaldi raised himself up to a knee and pulled out the binoculars he kept in his belt. He started scanning the tops of buildings looking for any sign of some place that might hold their treasure. It was still dark out but the kind of dark that let you see enough just to spook yourself. Artillery had been pounding the city for weeks and had not let up at all. Strikes that were close to their position shook his vision through the binoculars, but had been happening for so long that he barely noticed.
“Can you even see through those things right now? It’s nighttime.”
“So you’re really going to do this?” asked Henry while now fully sitting and leaning against the sandbag wall covering his window.
“You sparked something inside of me, Hank. It’s a mission now. That’s how we’ll justify it if anyone catches me out there running around with a couple of bottles.”
“You better hope whoever catches you is wearing gray. It’ll be a lot quicker of an end than if some GI catches you away from your post and drags your ass back to HQ. The Captain will probably torture you before shooting you. The Nazis will just shoot you.”
The Sergeant started gathering his gear in preparation for what might end up being a huge mistake. But he knew that the payoff would make it all worth it. The battle was about to break one way or another, and he’d rather not have to go through that sober. He contemplated whether or not to leave his rifle.
“You might end up needing this more than I will. You can’t exactly defend yourself if someone gets inside and makes it up here.”
He handed the M1 Garand down to the PFC and pulled out his pistol.
“I’ll move faster with this, anyway. Plus, I’m going to need to both hands.”
“You really think you’re going to find some beer out there, don’t you? I was only half serious when I said it.”
“Yeah, well, I’m full serious. You and I are going to be as drunk as a couple of Sailors by noon.”
With that, he began the climb down the rickety old church tower’s ladder, which was all the more dangerous in the dark. He didn’t know for sure where he was going or for how long he’d be gone, but he was focused now. He wasn’t sure what it was that Hank said that set him off, but felt like what he said about being undervalued to the rest of the unit was true. He was going to at least prove to one person that he could get something done; even if it meant temporarily abandoning his post to accomplish that.
To Be Continued
I'd just like to announce that I've decided to split off 'Of The Dim' from this site here and post it on it's own separate website. I really want to focus most of my writing time and energy towards that story and felt like it could benefit having it's own place to keep everything front and center.
I'll still post all my other writings here, and will try not to let it go too long in between.
Thanks to those who visit when they can and who have supported me along the way!
The new website can be found at www.ofthedim.com